Because I am trying to be optimistic. Can it get worse?
I keep saying that September 30th will end the worst year of my life.
Yes, you read that right. The worst year of my life. First my Grandfather died, then my Grandmother died, my beautiful Pearl died, my cat Spice died (I have had Spice since she was a tiny kitten that we found underneath a barn), and my husband left me.
I plan on making October 1st the beginning of a new, better year.
How will I start this? Why with new shoes of course. New shoes for a new journey. New shoes, fresh feet. I could make all sorts of analogies to annoy you. A friend of mine and I went shoe-shopping yesterday and I bought new aerobics shoes, a new pair of walking-around tennis shoes, and a pedometer.
Now, assuming no more horrible things happen to me, this year will be MUCH better than last, right? Right?
Because when you’re at the bottom, there’s nowhere to go but up.
It is good to have things to look forward to. My aunt and uncle are taking me and my cousin out for our birthdays (mid-October). I will be thirty, and my cousin will be 16. She was born on my 14th birthday–I even remember where I was when my mom called and told me. She and I have always been close. My aunt and uncle also host Thanksgiving dinner at their house, so I have a place to go for that. Christmas at my parents’ house will be enjoyable, as always, albeit a bit more lonely this year. A friend of mine and I have made plans for New Year’s Eve. And starting in January, if all goes well, my husband will leave for his pre-deployment training, and then mobilization.
When I get home, I’m putting on my new shoes and starting on my journey two days early, with a new aerobics DVD.